You’re worse than a crook to me
I see you and you won’t look at me
Something so special you took from me
You act like you’re shook of me
even though I was you’re victim
Didn’t understand then the system
Not the justice because there is no justice
It’s just us
and my word against yours
Devishly You know what occurred
but you’re a coward – that’s my word
I say as I try not to replay
that entire day
But the images melt me down to a headache
and some days it’s all over my face



They tell me I’m not positive
I dwell too much on the negative
Try as they might to give me medicine
I’m pointed out to be too negative
and it’s nothing personal or a challenge to my intelligence
It’s just how I’ve been
So leave me only in my own misery
I’ll never be happy despite the pills they’ve given me
Only so much can science solve
Only so much can I feel I belong
without thinking I’m better gone
but there I go on
Back to the negative
Swallow my medicine
Challenge my own intellect
I gotta get out of this negative
I need to get out of this negative

Old Rhymes


I have nothing to say what’s on my mind
So I connect the lines
of my old rhymes
previously pushed aside.
From politics to Korean pride
From Oppa Gabe to nephew Gabe
So many things before I wanted to say
but the rhyme scheme went away
so the old rhymes once pushed away
Come back to life
While I keep what’s on my mind
deep inside
and just write
feelings from the past
until my finger develops a callous
from love to malice
now passed.

I Miss You

Why without you can’t I make the right decisions?
I feel like I’m in this vulnerable position 

because you I’m missin’ 

A part me feels missin’

I lost the strength in me. 

They say this isn’t how you’d want me to be 

But as you see

This pitiful being is now me. 

My own parents said I’m weak. 

I cry so hard I lose speech. 

You know I used to always be able to speak. 

You pretty much instilled that aspect in me. 

Now look at me: my own parents called me weak.   

This is a nightmare I can’t wake up from. 

This is the outcome 

when someone you extremely loved 

is suddenly taken from you.   

Nothing I could ever dream of

is not having you to tell me what to do. 

Not having someone to catch me when I fall

and didn’t mind at all

Someone hard for others to get ahold of

but not me, you answered my calls.  

We had such a tight bond. 

You accepted I was a little off and odd

but you swore to God

I was your little sister.  

I put my handle on the Bible and called you my big brother.  

I’ve become so insecure 

and don’t reach out to others. 

No longer even my father and mother. 

They made it clear 

they don’t want to hear 

How I’m feeling here. 

Some days there’s a thickness in the air

and now no one seems to care

That I can’t breathe here. 

You said you always got me. 

I believed you. 

I’m waiting for you in the lobby. 

I need you. 

I’m such a lost cause. 

Two friends gave up 

I’m sure you saw. 

It wouldn’t hurt that much 

if you were to help me not be so lost. 

I’m so tired of crying. 

Burning people out. 

I keep thinking about dying. 

I just want out. 

I only believe in the Afterlife

No such thing as Hell

I’m such a burden that it’d be more of a sacrifice 

than putting others through this Hell. 

I miss you. 

When I got like this 

It’s like you professionally knew what to do. 

You remind me I was your baby sis

and you’d see me through.  

Here I am thinking this. 

I want to be able to be reunited with you

but every time I start to 

someone intervenes 

I just wish the cops and doctors would let me be.  


Gift with the words

I got a gift with words

So when does pinpointing the right word occur? 

I guess I’m not sure 

but until I do my gift with words will be insecure

Wrap my mind around every thought

But it’s absurd 

My mind gets obscured 

waiting for the right word to occur

It’s as if my brain burns 

waiting for that damn word… 

I got a gift with words. 

I got a gift with words. 

Problems of a Militant 

Militant minded

Blinded by blood diamonds 

Hollering at the silent 

I can’t stand being quiet

and seeing the world 

just twirl

in blood knowing we’re all behind it. 

Kids fleeing to be reunited

with their mothers trafficked by the Chinese 

So for them to flee to be free

finding the mothers for so long they hadn’t seen 

was futile

and bounty hunters pray on a starving child. 

And this hasn’t just been a short while 

But long and worsening. 

How can money be the first thing 

on the mind instead of human lives? 

It makes me sick inside. 

Countries war torn 

Held captured either by capitalist or ISIS 

Fuck who started it but who profits from behind it!

They got you terrified 

that every Muslim or Arab you walk by 

is a terrorist with some plot in mind

to take your life. 

The reality is it’s so flipped. 

They’re targeted by the paranoid and bigots. 

Refugees burning off their finger tips 

on electrical barbed wires

trying to escape the bombings and fire. 

Only to be in a refugee camp set on fire 

by those who make it difficult

to see they are not the individuals

behind the terror 

They’re the ones surviving the terror. 

Rather it be Syria or France. 

 It’s like no matter the matter they have no chance 

to feel relief and freedom at last. 

Children drowning on the shores of Greece. 

You read and hear these stories then go to bed in peace. 

How does it come down to this? 

The tragic this truly is

I know, like you, how it did come to this. 

The Oklahoma Bombing first described 

the spotting of two Arab guys 

seen nearby. 

How wrong the news outlets were! 

I mean, did it truly ever occur

that the Arab men they identified first 

were on their way to a coffee shop? 

Finding out it was a white man, oh what a shock! 

People of Color fear the police because most likely to be shot. 

People with mental illness fear the police because they’re just as likely to be shot. 

But please, ignore me for being so militant minded. 

For not being quite so blinded

to the fucked up world we people reside in

and practice their right to not give a fuck and to remain silent. 

Park In (Epilespy)


My hands jerk…

My legs jerk… 

My tongue jerks… 

This shit makes me want to join in and be a jerk

Which one of the poisons went to work

Bravo life you were out to make me miserable 

but you know my fucking principle – 

laugh or cry bitch, I’m only in the physical 

You’ll never best me in the spiritual 

Every headache you create I’ll deep down shake. Tears I might make 

will be replaced because I’ll meet that who Creates

Save me from all this pain 

Frontal lob issues. I’m borderline insane. Happiness I could never miss you 

You were too out of my life than in

but fuck it worst can happen in the end 

Pity party for none 

I just look up at the moon and sun 

thinking my life can’t quite be done 

if it only now has begun

This pesky interference is inexperienced 

I try so hard not to take life so serious 

but there are moments when the tears come because I’m hilarious 

laughing off the pain and shame 

It just can’t be that serious 

Yes tears run from eyes 

but in the event of my demise 

Know my spirit lives on in the happiness of every single tear I’ve cried 

and there’s no goodbyes

Not when I die 

Only say goodbye when I’ve been defeated by diseases 

It’s from there I don’t know if life can ever be completed 

I’d live my life in my own eyes miserable and defeated. 

I can’t imagine… how would I even manage… I’ve been through feeling abandoned and vanished I don’t want to go back… Close my eyes I can imagine.  

But until the day my body turns against me 

I’ll scribble my name quickly 

Come back do a 360 

Pump my fist asking who’s going with me? 

Park in when I’m at the darkest all in I’m fallin’ down trodden and crawlin I always had to do shit the hardest so now park in with the she who brings you words as gifts. 
That’s it.