Dying

2010

We each die a little more each day

Some of us can’t wait while others just got to take another’s away. 

Suffice to say, it’s what has caused me to fuck up

Take medicine to fix it

but gotta increase becuz Seroquel isn’t enough. 

Another therapist visit 

Lies that I don’t drink 

But I see my Unni sees through me

The disappointed face is enough to know what she thinks & she’s right about what she sees:

A problem with problems who accepts the problems & is too far gone in her head to solve them. 

Too far gone in spirit so I down the spirits until their bottle is like me – numb & hallow. 
Here’s more pills to swallow

Here’s another shot to down. 

It’ll be the same tomorrow

I’ll allow myself to drown

to relieve the pain. 
I got people to blame

Important people to push away

Before I spread the pain

Then pull back because I need them that day. 
Buy another bottle to numb my dying existence 

Pop more pills because the doctors said it’ll fix “it.”

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