The only thing I gotta prove
is I can handle this proof
Laughing acting like a fool
until the feelings bottom out
after being bottled up.
Head dizzy and full of doubt
it gets to be too much
Suddenly I wanna prove
I’m stronger than the abuse.
Pick a fight or two
and can take on any of you.
5’3 but I can stand 10 feet.
Once meek but this bottle helps me speak
Fuck it – I get loud
like my dad I can fucking shout
and lose control of myself, fists, and mouth.
Black out but this swig helps me out.
Fist clenched I can take out
any son of bitch
Bottle clenched and I take another swig.
I feel so big.
Days later I’m still not off of it
I can’t quit or I lose my confidence
Both fists clenched
Another bottle to swallow my pain.
Pick a fight to release that pain.
I can’t quit or I feel the shame…
I wanna feel bulletproof
I’d rather face this proof
than own up to the truth:
I’m not stronger than the abuse
Despite being bulletproof…