When my brother was murdered and I was told only a week before my heart surgery I had a really hard time writing. I used to show and read to him what I wrote and he always encouraged me to keep writing because I was great at it. i don’t know if my writer’s block was related to that but I was really frustrated and sad that I couldn’t write anything, anything at all. My creativity was gone, I couldn’t even write stories. It was just gone. Everything I tried to write was forced and not good enough, (though I don’t know if what I write lately is good but I like them so that’s all that matters, right?)

Anyway – this was the only thing I was able to write 8 months later. It needs crafting but I’ll never do it because to me it’s perfect because it started to kick the writer’s block.

Dedicated to Gabriel “Speedy G” Gonzales

A pain runs deep in my soul
and I’m afraid to let it go
There’s a void and a hole
in the middle of my heart
I don’t wanna be alone
It’s tearing me apart
I feel you in the dark
see you in a spark
Hear your voice in the rain
Think of your hugs when I’m in pain
Remember your laughter when I speak your name
I think I’m going insane.
How can they take you away
when I asked God to keep you safe?
I tried to live life day by day
Now I try to live each to the fullest
but it’s hard when I feel so lonely that I’m hopeless
I’m so damn lost without you I can’t focus


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