Getting By (From Age 16)

Age 16. Except for a few spots w/pretentious & major grammar spots, I don’t feel like kicking this Krystal’s ass that bad. Just curious on why I capitalized some words that aren’t that significant. 

Getting By

When I was just a little kid
This one cold late afternoon I was walking down Nicollet
When I saw these people throwing’ their cigarettes 
At this homeless body that was completely innocent 
The man was about 35, dirty hair & dirty eyes 
Deep mercy sighs, begging’ God for an early demise 
Layers of Rustic clothes with ubiquitous holes
And a Frost bitten nose, Though asleep I knew his story & soul
Living the regrets of No education
In the vanity of adolescence stole his mom’s medication 
Slept around, lost his kids & wife. Now sleeps on benches at night
My heart felt for his punished life 
You reap what you sow. He blew every chance to grow
And now he’s tortured by those with no pity in his soul
Constantly being jabbed, kick, & poked. The brunt of every cruel Joke
Nobody cares if he lives or dies 
And over time developed the same state of mind. 
He was only being, just to get by 

I knew this 6 year old girl in the hospital dying 
She knew it & took no denying 
At 3 she stopped crying & at 4 stopped trying
Cancerous pains was too much 
I sat down & said “Baby girl, please keep your head up.”
She gave me a bitter grunt
Shook her head & said she’s been waiting to die for months
In an instance she left me depressed & stuck 
I was inches away from the door
When I heard exhausted tears pour to the floor
She couldn’t take fighting anymore
Her beautiful sad brown eyes, met mine
And I saw my Reflection in them at the same time. 
She used try to live life, but yo’ this ain’t life. 
Her bandaged head took away all signs to even try. 
Her parents felt no more urgency to be by her side 
So she started feeling more like a bother 
Rather than being somebody’s daughter
She has a newborn sister 
that she’s never seen, but does miss her
Doctors kept sayin’ every 6 weeks she’s gone 
Each one’s been a tease, because she’s too strong
Before I could speak she fell in a coma
Another sleepless night for me in Minnesota
I took a deep sigh with a frustrated cry 
And reminded God, she’s just to get by

He comes from the product of poverty 
Filled with the blood of those enslaved as property 
As hopeless as life may seem
There’s so much he’s determined he’s gonna be
But teachers say all he’ll ever do is dream
Because Fate’s not gonna let him achieve 
I always saw greatness in the core of his eyes 
He always told me that he was gonna make it and blow everyone’s mind
Other kids made fun of his dark skin
But I told him to let darkness shine
The last day I worked with the school
As usual I saw him stealing food
Sat down & said “I Believe in you.”
In the corner of his a tear grew
He told me he knew what his life was comin’ to
I told him it wasn’t true unless You let it be
Right then he looked at me
His eyes no longer held that beam
But contained a sadness that wouldn’t let me Breathe
Told me to be like the world and leave
Said “fuck life” & that he never cared to be alive
He was doing what he needed just to get by


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